IID: Summertime and the Livin' is Easy: IIDD, Winter Solstice Approaches: Saturday, December 1st

The first method for estimating the intelligence of a ruler is to look at the men he has around him. -Niccolo Machiavelli, political philosopher and author (1469-1527)

Winter Solstice

Dear Excruciator in Excelsis, Wielder of the Lash, Burner of Midnight Oil and Pourer of Same,

I am compelled to defend my learned colleague and cousin M.A. Tanner from the redundant criticism which you have artlessly heaped upon him. You drag him over the coals for pedantic wording... I mean is that not how pedants (even retired ones) must express themselves?

As for his missive being loop-hole riddled, we are all aware that Mark did not come by his nickname "Purveyor of Swiss Cheese Logic" by chance, but surely you hyperbolate, for from were I sit his latest effort is clearly not mortally riddled but rather just wounded. All of these blasts were fired over poor Mark's bow within the jurisdiction of your critique's first sentence and yet that structure was further stretched by another salvo, a shot aimed at his use of legal- speak. We know too well that Mark's brother-in-law, the fair Colm, is a distinguished lawyer hailing from The Rock. It follows that the two would be on long distance speaking terms, but as the signal from St. Johns is often breaking up, it is also quite clear that Mark would be privy to only scattered and short snippets of legal reasoning. I rest my case.

I suspect that I would be wise to gird my tender loins for Sunday's cut and thrust. But I will march bravely into the arena knowing that quality first aid is at hand. Should I bring two coins for the Boatman just in case Mark succumbs to the wounds of the battlefield and the excitement of the first aid tent?

Defender of Hopeless Causes, Stephen

Dear Keeper of Lost Causes! (Bye-the-bye, a fabulous mystery by Jussi Adler-Olsen for non-readers everywhere!)

I must, Dear Sir, admit that I am but mightily persuaded by your latest and most cogently argued brief. You have, to your everlasting credit, come the defense of a poltroon, a craven milquetoast if ever there was one, proving only that blood is in fact thicker than the very best of cask strength malt. For this familial loyalty I bear no immediate grudge but will kept yon chip upon mine epauletted shoulder in case of future needs. This being said, it is my pleasure, Good Sir, to enter into intelligent discourse with a broade and fayre mind, so unlike most of the niddering NRBCers who populate the fenns and bogs of audiomarshland. I trust, therefore, my Esteemed and Learned Colleague, that you will not be seduced by the rabble, to follow their slothful ways but will remain steadfast and honourable in your allegiance to the Written Word! Bibliographinensis Honoris Causa Ad Verbum, Maltus Sanctum, Excruciatore Summi!

PS: On the feast fare front, the great unwashed have been more than munificent in their offers of sweetmeats and strong drink, (With the notable exception of Sieur Guyye de Grande Pomme de Terre Noveau, [Mr Potatoe Head for those without access to Google Tranlslate!], whose promises evaporate no sooner than his forked tongue can mouth his honied, duplicitous pledges!), in spite of the fact that Chatelaine Coriandre and I specifically decreed that no viands, foodstuffs or sustainable, organic, ancient grain fed pisces were expected. To reject such unbounded generosity would be inhospitable, in the extreme, of course, and so we welcome these kind, kind offerings with thanks aplenty and more. To this end, I reply, My Liege Lord Stefano, that I leave it to your astute culinary mind to decide betwixt and between the delicately diced Waldorfian or the parry and thrust of the Rib Ticklers. The Wassail Walnut Whirlygig's dietary restrictions make a taboo of the fatted calf so either the chick pea curry or the coarsely chopped nutlets would provide nourishment aplenty, methinks, for this most difficult of guests! In Gustatorum Promoventur ad Mensa!

PPS: WWW's same dietary restrictions apply to alcoholic libations. Consequently, he will be sipping Camomile tea, (hence the allusion to teetotalism), along with Peter Rabbit, , while the rest of the jolly lads will be swiggin' doch-an-dorrachs aplenty.

PPPS: Whisper a little prayer for the poor sod, domani, Prithee Kinde Sir!

Jussi Adler-Olssen

Hi Patrick,

Lynnie and I are nearing the end of our week at Paradisus Resort in Playa del Carmen. Lynne's nephew Brett has been married off to an appropriately beautiful daughter of a Bulgarian clan, many of whom were also in attendance. Attached is a shot of Lynne and her sisters on wedding night.

We've been planning to stay over in Vancouver tomorrow night to attend your holiday celebration, which we're looking forward to. Can you please advise the time of the event?
Saludos, Peter (aka JDP)

Here's the photo promised in the first e-mail.

Hi Dom Jugos!

Great snap of The Sisterhood! Wonder what nefarious plans they are concealing behind those alluring smiles? Glad to finally have evidence of the North Bay Connection! Glad wedding went well.

Looking forward to having our Jet-Setters fly in from Paradise, no less, just for our pre-Yuletide Swarming! Gates will be unlocked at 5:00pm but if you come beforehand, (open season is declared at 3:00pm), you can join the NRBC's, (Non-Readers Book Club's), acrimonious debate of Thinking Fast and Slow, (Take your pick but make up your mind quickly!) The most vociferous are usually those, not surprisingly, who have not read the book! The most heated, pig-headed arguments between same non-readers. The calming balm of malt is often needed to prevent fistacuffs. Some of the other significant others of some of the combatants will be huddled in the kitchen as UN Observers, cheering on The Brotherhood in their internecine blood-letting so Lurking is more than welcome to attend before the festivities, proper, begin. Be welcome but be warned! (Please sign attached boiler plate waiver of liability: The Islay Inn is deemed not responsible for...etc., etc.)

Fondestos to Lurking. Travel safely. See you domani at whichever appointed hour you choose. Cheers, Patrizzio, Head Referee and Malt Apportionado!

PS: Enjoy the sun while you can and prepare for the rain in your near future! Patrizzio, Prognosticator Extraordinaire!

Patricio,

Sounds great. We'll be there after 5, as our landing isn't until 3:30ish. Looking forward to non watered down resort booze and decent wines! Ciao, Pedro

Hi again, Dom Pedro!

Cask Strength ONLY at the Islay Inn! Cheers, Patrizzio "No Small Ale" Dunn!

Hi Pat,

Hope you and Corinne are still well. Unfortunately, Jane's dad is far from that. In fact, he seems to be dying, from this morning on. So the chances of us appearing for your party tomorrow are, sadly, very slim. So sorry about that. Kjell

Hi Kjell!

Terribly sorry to hear about Jane's Dad! Out thoughts and sympathy are with you at this most difficult of times. If we don't see you tomorrow please let us know how matters stand. Trust that somehow we will be able to see you both, if only briefly, before we leave town on December 12th. Again, heartfelt thoughts, Corinne and Patrizzio!

Hi David!

I just ran across a reply by you on A.Word.A.Day:

From: David Skulski
Subject: lachrymal
Def: Relating to or inducing tears.
This fine word immediately brought to mind a musical work that was an important part of my career in historical music, the Lachrimae, or Seaven Teares in Seaven Passionate Pavanes (London, 1604) by John Dowland (rhymes with "Poland"). Each pavan (a stately dance) is a variant of his famous song, Flow my Tears.
David Skulski, Vancouver, Canada

I take it you are the one and same family who made their fortune with Edibaubles! We lived on 13th and Vine, initially and then moved to 12th and McKenzie. We now live on Lamey's Mill Road, across from the water park on GI and have done so since 1998.

Trust you and your family are well. Be great to get together at some point. Do you still play bridge? We often have two or three tables and make a dinner evening of it.

Finally, bit late for an invitation, I know, but we are hosting a pre-Yuletide Open House, at our place, tomorrow, starting at 5:00pm. At any rate, we do hope you will be able to join us for a glass of wine and/or a wee dram and a bite on the 2nd! If not, let's try to meet before we leave or certainly sometime after our return, in late February. Fondestos and Cheers, Cora Lee and Patrizzio!

Pics: Corinne with Rhoda and Al, her brother, at our place, last Sunday, after the Jill Barber concert at the Electric Owl; at Squamish last Sunday morning before I left to ride back to Vancouver. We had driven up the day before to spend the night with close friends, Ruth and Rick. Played bridge all evening and were trounced by The Sisterhood!

Hello Patrick,

Thanks for the detailed update. I won’t return the favour, though; it would take you a week to read it. I am indeed of the Edibauble clan although I think I’m better known for other activities.

And thanks for the invitation but I’m performing Bach’s Christmas Cantata “Christen, ätzet diesen Tag” Sunday evening. Regards, David Skulski

Hi Goils:

I found the above entry by David on A.Word.A.Day and sent him a brief update and an invitation to come to our Open House. Circle of Life!

Hi again, David!

Terrific to re-connect.Hope we can manage to get together in the New Year to hear a week's worth of reading! Trust concert goes well. Cheers, Patrizzio!